You've just stumbled upon a conversation in-progress. The following is a transcript from a conversation between Filmfodder Contributing Editor Eva Weber and Editor Mac Slocum. It's an unadulterated, unedited record of what we really think of the Oscars.

Mac - at 8:28 PM tyra banks needs a tranquilizer Eva - at 8:29 PM at least one. or a couple of drinks. Mac - at 8:29 PM that "you-go-girl" crap needs to go Eva - at 8:30 PM she needs to go. she should stick with victoria's secret - just walk around in a bikini and smile. Mac - at 8:30 PM yeah, she looks great, but she's a moron Mac - at 8:31 PM annette bening is going to pop Eva - at 8:31 PM i haven't seen her yet. she's actually there? wouldn't that be funny if she had to leave because she went into labor? Mac - at 8:32 PM yup, she's there -- she probably needs two seats. Mac - at 8:32 PM oh no, not 2001 Mac - at 8:34 PM oh thank god billy crystal is hosting this year. Whoopi made a fool of herself last year Eva - at 8:35 PM oh god, billy crystal is so funny. you're right, whoopi was just too much. and really ugly dresses. but this should be good. Mac - at 8:36 PM did you see it a couple years ago when he "auditioned" for the "Full Monty?" That was classic Eva - at 8:37 PM NO, I didn't see that. I remember the one that opened with The English Patient. Eva - at 8:40 PM Hilary Swank looks really good. Gorgeous dress. Mac - at 8:40 PM yeah, she looks good, but there's something evil about her. She's got hard looks -- I wouldn't want to cross her Eva - at 8:42 PM They said earlier that she used to be on 90210. That would get to anyone. Mac - at 8:42 PM chloe sevigny (or however you spell her name) looks great but did you see the guy she's with? Where'd she pick that mongrel up? Mac - at 8:43 PM I remember watching her on 90210 -- yes, I watched it. She was Steve's girlfriend. She was also the "star" of Karate Kid 4. Having seen that, I NEVER would have pegged her for a future Oscar contender Eva - at 8:44 PM Yeah, the guy is weird. I don't like her dress though. She said she picked it herself and that's just what it looks like. God, I wish he'd stop singing. I hate this part. Mac - at 8:44 PM this opening is old, but at least they canned the dancing. Yes, that's a definite plus. Mac - at 8:46 PM Kevin Spacey has to win. I like Denzel, but Spacey is the best actor of the last decade. Mac - at 8:47 PM I'm surprised Thora Birch and Mena Suvari weren't nominated for best supporting -- both of them were good in American Beauty Eva - at 8:47 PM Yeah. I think he will win. Denzel was good too, but Beauty has pretty much won everything so far. Mac - at 8:49 PM woohoo! Cameron oh my god does she look good Eva - at 8:50 PM Jack looks really old now. Probably as old as he really is. Did you know Cameron and Drew can't stand each other? I love it, how they make nice for the camera's. Mac - at 8:50 PM really? I didn't hear that. They want each other dead? If DREW even looks at Cameron the wrong way there's gonna be hell to pay Eva - at 8:51 PM Oh yeah? What are you gonna do? Eva - at 8:52 PM Sorry Cameron didn't fall out of her dress. It's probably taped in all the important places:) Mac - at 8:52 PM I'll write a sternly-worded letter to her publicist. I'll make fun of her lisp. I'll launch a scorched-earth campaign against Daisy Pictures! Mac - at 8:53 PM heh, I wonder if she's wearing the same dress to the Oscar parties ;) Eva - at 8:54 PM Ok. You and about three million other obsessed guys. She'll probably wear the same dress - it seems to work well:) Eva - at 8:56 PM Anette Bening looks great though - haha, that was funny, the Bening/Beatty joke. Mac - at 8:56 PM yeah, I liked that one -- and the "armed and pretentious" thing was good too Mac - at 8:57 PM haley joel osment has to have an iq of 200 Mac - at 8:57 PM oh jesus, child stars. Wonder if we'll see clips from their rehab stings Eva - at 8:58 PM Here comes the wunderkind. Oh, he's good. Yeah, at least 200. Who are these people? I don't know most of them. Likely because they're still in rehab? Mac - at 8:59 PM they're all dead Mac - at 9:00 PM wow, Heather fills out that dress quite well ;) Eva - at 9:00 PM Oh. Hm, Heather looks good - as usual. Think they're real? Mac - at 9:01 PM yeah, I think they're real, but even if they aren't I don't care dammit, they've got to whip through these sound and costume oscars Mac - at 9:01 PM cool, I'm glad the matrix won for sound -- that's a great movie (even with Keanu) Eva - at 9:01 PM Yeah, let's get to the interesting stuff. Go Matrix! Eva - at 9:02 PM Keanu isn't too bad. Mac - at 9:03 PM keanu is dumber than a box of hair. Cucumbers can exert more emotion Eva - at 9:03 PM OH MY GOD! I didn't think it could get this bad. I bet she designed that herself too. Mac - at 9:05 PM I feel bad for the normal people who have to get up there and give speeches. "Um, I'd like to thank my mom and God and um, yeah, all those people, and I really can't believe this and um, right." Mac - at 9:05 PM heh, Winona had a hard time wrapping her mind around the word "Dickensian." Mac - at 9:06 PM I predict that Tobey Maguire will win an Oscar within the next five years Eva - at 9:06 PM OK, now if you're nominated, you should make damn sure to have somone to help you with your clothes - even if you're just a make-up person. Well, I don't know - they get to keep an Oscar. Eva - at 9:07 PM Yeah, I think so too. Way to go Billy. At least somone agrees with me on the hat. Mac - at 9:08 PM alrighty, supporting actress time Mac - at 9:08 PM oh wait, they're just giving the names -- this isn't the award, is it? Mac - at 9:08 PM or maybe it is the award -- hmm, bought time we got something good Mac - at 9:09 PM Jolie is probably going to win Eva - at 9:09 PM I think they're just giving names - no, wait, it's gotta be the award. I want Sixth Sense to win!!! Mac - at 9:09 PM toni collette was really good, but it was an understated role Eva - at 9:10 PM True. But I'm not a great fan of Angelina lately - she is really weird. Eva - at 9:11 PM Here we go. Mac - at 9:11 PM alllrighty, here it is AH HA! I KnEW it would be Jolie Mac - at 9:11 PM oh, daddy will be so proud ;) Mac - at 9:11 PM Coburn better watch out, she might knife him Eva - at 9:12 PM damn. Well, she does deserve it. Oh - that's who she's in love with. I knew there was something about her:) Very bad hair tonight. And that's so rehearsed. Mac - at 9:13 PM she's got that elvira thing going Eva - at 9:16 PM OK, who do you think will get Best Supporting Actor? Mac - at 9:19 PM hmm, good question. I hope Haley gets it, but I think Caine might sneak in and nab the award from the little man Eva - at 9:19 PM I'm rooting for Haley too. He was awesome. Eva - at 9:20 PM And for Michael Clarke Duncan! Man, I didn't know they could make tuxedos that big. Mac - at 9:20 PM these filler p ieces are a bit much -- they could get this telecast down to two hours if they just got on with it Eva - at 9:21 PM They could. But it wouldn't be dramatical enough if they were actually on time. Mac - at 9:22 PM good point. Wow, this Oscar special covering the last 2 million years is giving me a better sense of history than ANY education I received Eva - at 9:22 PM Gives the viewer a chance to go to the bathroom though:) Mac - at 9:22 PM from this I know that Kevin Costner fought in the Civil War Eva - at 9:23 PM And they say TV is not good for you:) Mac - at 9:23 PM heh, they should let Oliver Stone teach a history course. CONSPIRACIES EVERYWHERE! Eva - at 9:25 PM You mean there really aren't any conspiracies? That explains so much. Alright, now it's time to get on with the show. Mac - at 9:26 PM wait a damn minute! THEY SHOWED BRAVEHEART AT THE END. Oh gee, that makes so much sense. Those Scots are so behind they're still fighting the English Eva - at 9:27 PM Now that is a strategically well-cut dress. I bet she's wearing nothing but perfume under that. Mac - at 9:28 PM oh no, amateurs speaking in front of the audience again. Sometimes I can't watch these people -- I feel bad for them Eva - at 9:29 PM Ok, is it me or are things just not as glamorous this year? Mac - at 9:30 PM how do you mean? Mac - at 9:31 PM did you see toy story 2? Eva - at 9:31 PM Lots of bad hair and simple dresses. Not the usual Hollywood glamour. Nothing scandalous yet either. Mac - at 9:31 PM hen, not yet -- but we haven't seen Jennifer Lopez yet Mac - at 9:33 PM whoa, gwynneth didn't look happy. Maybe she ate too much at dinner -- two grapes instead of her customary one Eva - at 9:34 PM Yes, I saw it. Not voluntarily, but I saw it. Is Jennifer Lopez there? I really want to see Halle Berry and the thirteen stitches. damn, missed Fishstick. What is she wearing this year? Mac - at 9:35 PM not sure what gwynnie is wearing -- probably a hollowed-out toothpick Mac - at 9:35 PM peter coyote's career is in the shitter -- from actor to Oscar announcer. Eva - at 9:36 PM I still have to see the Insider - it looks really good. Haha that's funny. Did you see the guy from Southpark who's wearing the dress she had on last year? Mac - at 9:36 PM lol! Is that what he's wearing? I think that's Matt Stone Eva - at 9:38 PM Yeah, I think that's his name. Joan Rivers asked him if this was his first time at the Oscars and he said it would probably also be his last:) Mac - at 9:38 PM did he kill her? If he killed Joan Rivers I'll have enormous respect for him Mac - at 9:39 PM helloo vanessa Eva - at 9:40 PM Nope. Sorry. But she announced to the world that she hasn't had sex in six months - since she lost the vacuum attachment. Yes. Hello. I think she's pregnant again, that's why:) Eva - at 9:41 PM Oh, Sarah's good. I love her voice. Mac - at 9:41 PM yeah, sarah is the best. I can listen to her for hours Eva - at 9:42 PM It's amazing, such a little person with such a great voice. Eva - at 9:43 PM Magnolia. Did you see that? Hey, are they going to to the Southpark song along with these now? Mac - at 9:44 PM I didn't see Magnolia -- I figure I'll rent it. Yeah, they're doing "blame canada" -- it'll be interesting to see how they handle that. I heard Robin Williams is singing it. They'll probably just bleep out the swears. Eva - at 9:45 PM So basically it's going to be one really long beep:) But Robin Williams will make it funny. Eva - at 9:46 PM Ok, now Phil Collins needs hair or a hat - those earplugs look like a hearing aid. Mac - at 9:46 PM actually, blame canada doesn't have that many swears in it. Uncle Fucka should have been nominated. Mac - at 9:47 PM these sappy disney ballads make my ears drip with puss Eva - at 9:47 PM Yeah, it should have been. But that would just be too much for the Academy. Mac - at 9:49 PM nsync?! Eva - at 9:49 PM Yeah, I'm not a big Disney fan. And neither do I understand they hype about 'NSYNC - or however they spell themselves. Gosh, Gloria Estefan is really short. Oh, here it is! Mac - at 9:49 PM the curly-haired kid in Nsync looks like Krakow from My So Called Life Mac - at 9:50 PM lol! Robin Williams cracks me up Eva - at 9:50 PM ooohhh! That was a great start! Yeah, he's funny. Mac - at 9:50 PM there's no way blame canada will ever win -- it SHOULD -- but there's no chance Eva - at 9:51 PM You never know - miracles do happen:) I hope it wins. It's head and shoulders above the rest. Mac - at 9:51 PM yeah, it's hilarious -- much better than that sappy crap Mac - at 9:51 PM never thought I'd see a slash going through the canadian flag on the Oscar telecast Eva - at 9:52 PM I told you, miracles do happen. Well, Cher looks tame tonight. Mac - at 9:53 PM it's gonna be phil collins Mac - at 9:53 PM AWWWW YEAH I should go to vegas Eva - at 9:54 PM How'd you know? Yes, go while the lucky streak lasts:) Mac - at 9:54 PM dunno -- oscar intuition I suppose. Randy Newman has won too many Eva - at 9:55 PM I thought he would keep it short. Eva - at 9:57 PM Schwarzenegger. They said about him earlier that he has been called the man with the best developed body in the world. Right. He's short and has way too much muscle and then there's the problem with his face... Mac - at 9:58 PM is he short? I've had an argument with my mom for years -- she thinks he's really short, but I tend to think he's at least normal size, if not a little taller. I think they're getting that "best developed body" thing from an old Guinness Records entry. Eva - at 10:00 PM Well, he wouldn't qualify as a midget, but he's only 5'9" I think - and with all that muscle it makes him appear even shorter. The guy is almost as wide as he's tall! Mac - at 10:00 PM he's 5'9"! Wow, didn't realize he was that short Mac - at 10:00 PM I can't believe Thora Birch is the little girl from Patriot Games Eva - at 10:01 PM Well, she's not that little anymore:) She looks good. I think she'll be around for a while. Mac - at 10:01 PM prison movies always win these documentary prizes Mac - at 10:02 PM yeah, she looks really good. I probably shouldn't say that -- I think she's still under 18 ;) Mac - at 10:03 PM dammit, get up on stage! You won a documentary, not best picture. You AREN'T ALLOWED TO STROLL! Eva - at 10:03 PM As long as she's 17 1/2 you're good:) Ok, amateurs again. MY GOD the hair. Mac - at 10:03 PM jesus, get on with it. No one cares! Move along! Eva - at 10:03 PM She looks like she's going to faint! Mac - at 10:03 PM we thank, we thank. blah, blah, blah. Eva - at 10:04 PM They should just have a generic speech for theses people. Mac - at 10:04 PM lol, great idea! I [name] thank the Academy, God and [insert 2 people of your choice here] Eva - at 10:05 PM These two are beginning to look alike, don't you think? Mac - at 10:06 PM uma and ethan? Yeah, they both look ill oh no, he's got a froggy throat on tv! Eva - at 10:07 PM How great, he's losing his voice. Nice accent too. You could add that to your collection:) Mac - at 10:07 PM this guy sounds like a russian dictator. Eva - at 10:07 PM He probably once was. Mac - at 10:08 PM judi dench won last year for about 10 minutes to screen time. Amazing Mac - at 10:08 PM allllrighty, best supporting actor time Eva - at 10:09 PM Go Haley! Mac - at 10:10 PM c'mon haley! Eva - at 10:10 PM Haley or Michael Clarke Duncan. Mac - at 10:11 PM it'll probably be caine Eva - at 10:11 PM He's always lost so far. No, Haley is too good. Mac - at 10:12 PM CRAP! the wall street journal poll has been right so far Eva - at 10:12 PM NOW - damn. Really? I never even looked at their poll. Eva - at 10:13 PM How sweet - I think he might cry. And Jude Law doesn't seem very happy. Mac - at 10:14 PM yeah, they had caine for best supporting, jolie for best supporting, denzel for best actor, American beauty for best pic and swank for best actress Eva - at 10:15 PM It's nice that he acknowledges everyone, but come on now. Mac - at 10:15 PM damn, haley should have won Eva - at 10:17 PM Yep. Not that Caine didn't deserve it, but that eleven year-old was way better than all of them. Mac - at 10:18 PM haley out-acted every single one of them. They should all take lessons from him Eva - at 10:19 PM But did you feel how everyone held their breath for a second before the name was read? Haley is going to be huge though. Mac - at 10:20 PM I hope so -- he seems like he's bound to succeed. That kid's got serious range Eva - at 10:21 PM Wow, the divorce took years off Jane Fonda. Or the settlement allowed her a really good plastic surgeon. Mac - at 10:22 PM they're not divorced yet, are they? Eva - at 10:23 PM Not yet? I thought they were. But definitely separated. Mac - at 10:24 PM yeah, they're separated I think it's sad, but I never know any of the foreign directors Eva - at 10:25 PM I doubt anyone knew him before they had to watch the tapes and cast the votes. Wait, honorary Oscar - they don't vote for that, do they? The Academy just picks someone? Eva - at 10:26 PM Subtitles - that's new. They should have done that for Begnini last year. Mac - at 10:26 PM yeah, it's usually given to a "respected" director. There was a minor controversy last year because the director who got it was supposedly a snitch during the blacklisting days in 50s hollywood Mac - at 10:27 PM they should have shot begnini with a heavy sedative Eva - at 10:28 PM Yeah, I remember that. Well, Begnini is Italian. I don't think a sedative would have made a difference:) Mac - at 10:28 PM woohoo! Matrix is two for two Eva - at 10:28 PM How many is it up for? Mac - at 10:29 PM not sure -- maybe just these two Eva - at 10:31 PM Uh, Salma Hayek. I think she's a little hard to understand sometimes. They shouldn't give her all those big words. Mac - at 10:31 PM yeah, she hasn't mastered english yet. She overpronunciates a lot and in the process she butchers the words Eva - at 10:32 PM Here he goes...He said in an interview once he got this strong because his mother used to bathe him in hayflowers when he was a baby. Seriously. Eva - at 10:33 PM Ok, now this was so cool, I think the Matrix will get it again. Mac - at 10:33 PM yeah, the matrix should definitely get it. The bullet time stuff is amazing Eva - at 10:34 PM How did Stuart Little get in there? YES! Mac - at 10:34 PM awww yeah! Matrix scores again! Eva - at 10:35 PM He looks like he's trying to hit someone with his Oscar:) Eva - at 10:36 PM Hah! First one they cut off! Mac - at 10:37 PM poor guy got axed Eva - at 10:38 PM He just spoke too slowly. Mac - at 10:38 PM probably stoned Eva - at 10:38 PM Probably - though I wouldn't know:) Mac - at 10:39 PM it's hard to tell during the Oscars -- I think the whole place is stoned Eva - at 10:41 PM WHAT'S with the roses? I know she's there for Beauty, but come on. You don't work for 1-800-flowers. Mac - at 10:42 PM I've never liked Diane Keaton Mac - at 10:43 PM ha! this is funny -- crystal cracks me up Mac - at 10:43 PM I hope he keeps doing this -- the inside thoughts of the stars Eva - at 10:43 PM Yeah, she's odd. Oh, this is good! No way Begnini got that. Eva - at 10:44 PM I see white people - that's the best so far. Mac - at 10:44 PM lol, yeah jack! Eva - at 10:45 PM And he's right on that one too! Eva - at 10:45 PM What the heck? Why is he there? What is his point? Mac - at 10:46 PM burt bacharach? Lord knows why he's at the oscars Mac - at 10:46 PM hey garth! Where's that Chris Gaines guy now! Hmm? Eva - at 10:46 PM Couldn't he leave the hat at home just this once? Mac - at 10:47 PM it's surgically attached -- and I bet garth wears a girdle Mac - at 10:47 PM ray charles! Now we're talkin! Eva - at 10:47 PM LOL! I'd have to agree. Mac - at 10:47 PM even though he sounds horrible Mac - at 10:48 PM oh ray, what did you do? Eva - at 10:48 PM Sounds like he's on something too. Mac - at 10:49 PM poor ray, that was horrible Eva - at 10:50 PM And it's getting worse. I think they should let new people write the show. Hey, how about the film students at Emerson? Just kidding. Mac - at 10:51 PM lol, not likely Eva - at 10:51 PM Oh Jesus - I thought he was going to die right there. Mac - at 10:51 PM SHAFT! Mac - at 10:51 PM SLAP THAT BASS! AWWW YEAH Eva - at 10:51 PM Yeah, that's more like it. Mac - at 10:52 PM we used to sing the shaft theme in high school -- a bunch of skinny white kids ;) Mac - at 10:53 PM oh my. Memories. The only time I ever liked this song was when Tom Hanks sang it in "Big." Memmmmmorrrieeeeees. Likethecornersofmymind. Misty watercolored PIC-tures.... Eva - at 10:54 PM Not bad:) Ok, time to move on people. Mac - at 10:54 PM NOT DIONNE WARWICK! I HATE DIONNE WARWICK Mac - at 10:55 PM DIONNE WARWICK IS MY HELL Mac - at 10:55 PM dammit, there's more music in this awards show than the grammies Eva - at 10:56 PM I think they all have neck problems - they keep wagging their heads. Yeah, I can see why she is your hell. Look at the bright side, it can only get better now. Mac - at 10:56 PM dionne warwick and joan rivers should be put to sleep Eva - at 10:57 PM They should be tortured first. NO - NO MORE. Mac - at 10:58 PM they've gotta get this thing moving. Antonio Banderas is going to present? Someone better get a translater out there. Eva - at 10:59 PM Heck, yeah. I don't know why, but he always looks like he hasn't bathed in two weeks. Mac - at 10:59 PM nasty Eva - at 11:00 PM I just don't get why everyone thinks he' so hot. Mac - at 11:00 PM great, more dot-com ads. I'm sick of them. Although, those little baby Bob ads for ifreenet are funny Mac - at 11:01 PM angela bassett could break me in two -- she can probably bench-pressa football team Eva - at 11:02 PM What about the new Jennifer Love Hewitt movie ad? That's frightening. Well, Angela sure has muscles. Haha. That's funny. But she probably could. Mac - at 11:03 PM jennifer love boobies? That tv film was supposed to air last fall but was yanked because it sucked so much Eva - at 11:04 PM There you've got it. Banderas is presenting foreign language film - no need to really speak English, because no one really cares anyway. Mac - at 11:04 PM yeah, it's a bathroom award Eva - at 11:06 PM Yuck, just look at his hair. So slick, he probably slips when he walks. Eva - at 11:06 PM What's he saying? Mac - at 11:06 PM I've seen Women on the Verge -- it's a good one. Really funny Eva - at 11:08 PM Oh no - he's gonna go on forever. Thank God. damn, I knew it - nothing can stop the guy. Mac - at 11:08 PM lol! He makes begnini look like an english teacher -- great line Eva - at 11:09 PM Yeah, that was a good one. Oh look, one of your least favorite people. Mac - at 11:10 PM keanu? I can see the blood dripping from his brain -- all those big words must have popped a vessel Eva - at 11:10 PM so young and already so cynical?:) Mac - at 11:11 PM I've seen his work -- there's good reason to be cynical Eva - at 11:11 PM I know. Ok, get rid of the lonely classical guy NOW. Mac - at 11:12 PM ed norton -- here's a guy who should win an oscar Eva - at 11:12 PM Uh, Ed Norton. Looks very tired. Great voice though. Mac - at 11:13 PM I think Eyes Wide Shut would have been a great movie if Norton had been in it Eva - at 11:14 PM Yeah, ed's awesome. Didn't see Eyes, but Norton's good in pretty much anything he does. What's he been in lately? Wasn't he in American History X? Mac - at 11:14 PM yeah, he was in History X. He's got a new comedy coming out that he also directed -- it's got Jenna Elfman and Ben Stiller in it Eva - at 11:15 PM History X was great. Has he ever been nominated for an Oscar? Mac - at 11:16 PM yeah, he was nominated for History and for Primal Fear, which was his first movie role Eva - at 11:18 PM Ok, now they should be getting down to business. Time's almost up. I think they'll go at least 25 minutes over. Mac - at 11:20 PM yeah, at least. I think we've got another hour Eva - at 11:21 PM Oh, great Dunkin Donuts commercial. Eva - at 11:21 PM Now here's a guy with attitude - and I mean that in a good way. Mac - at 11:22 PM sam jackson? He's the best. No one says "motherfucker" better than him Eva - at 11:23 PM True. Yeah, he's great. I really didn't like Pulp Fiction though. Mac - at 11:23 PM I think Julianne Moore is one of the few actresses who will be able to successfully take over Jodie Foster's role in Silence of the Lambs. She's a great choice Eva - at 11:25 PM Yes, she totally is. She's one of those who came out of nowhere - I remember her from Nine Months and then nothing and suddenly she's everywhere. Uh, Sleepy Hollow. Awesome. I loved that movie. Mac - at 11:25 PM I never saw it -- wasn't christopher walken the headless horseman? Eva - at 11:26 PM Yes, and he was gooood! Johnny Depp was hilarious too. Really good balance between scary and funny in that movie. Mac - at 11:27 PM hmm, I'll have to see it Ashley Judd -- hmmmmmm Eva - at 11:27 PM I think she's a little too purple. Mac - at 11:28 PM tonight she is, but a few years ago she showed up in this white dress. Whoa Mac - at 11:28 PM geez, is that four for the Matrix? Eva - at 11:29 PM Oh, was that the one cut above the thigh? Yep, that's four for the Matrix. Mac - at 11:30 PM yeah, it was the white dress that just went up...and up... damn, four for the matrix. Impressive Mac - at 11:31 PM I hope jack is sporting that mustache for a film role Eva - at 11:31 PM Yeah, I'm impressed too. Vice President Jack Nicolson! Now there's a great team. I hope so too, but at least he's funny. Mac - at 11:32 PM he's a cool man -- very slick Eva - at 11:33 PM But man, can he pull it off. Mac - at 11:33 PM yeah, sure can Eva - at 11:34 PM How old is he? He looks good with the hair. Better than a comb-over any day. Mac - at 11:35 PM jack? Not sure -- late sixties maybe? Eva - at 11:35 PM Seems like he's been around forever. So what do you think about Warren Beatty? Mac - at 11:36 PM I like him -- he's done some interesting stuff. How about you? Eva - at 11:37 PM I haven't seen a lot of his stuff, but I remember Dick Tracy and Bulworth. I like him. Eva - at 11:38 PM Why is the award so ugly????? Mac - at 11:39 PM bulworth was okay, but I wish he had stopped with the rhyming Mac - at 11:39 PM the naked gold man? Eva - at 11:40 PM No, the ugly head. I assume it's the Thalberg person, but it's just damn ugly. Hey, Brad Pitt brought Jennifer. Mac - at 11:41 PM oh yes, such a lovely couple ;) Mac - at 11:41 PM they'd have the greasiest children on the planet Eva - at 11:43 PM They probably would:) Alright people, move on. Mac - at 11:44 PM actually, I kind of like this speech Eva - at 11:45 PM I do too - well, up until now. I'm not that interested in his family affairs. Mac - at 11:45 PM yeah, now he's rambling Eva - at 11:46 PM He's shaking a little too. They better get him off stage and give him a drink. Eva - at 11:46 PM Uh, Mel Gibson is next. Now he's hot! Mac - at 11:46 PM "get me a vodka tonic STAT!" Mac - at 11:47 PM you and my mom would get along -- she drools over Mel Eva - at 11:47 PM Well, she has good taste!! I loved him in Bird on a wire - you got to see his butt too:) Mac - at 11:49 PM I'm glad you can derive such enjoyment from his buttocks Mac - at 11:49 PM brad pitt -- someone delouse him before he gets too close to the audience! Mac - at 11:50 PM if American beauty doesn't win for best cinematography there's no justice in this world Mac - at 11:50 PM WOOHOO! Beauty wins! Eva - at 11:51 PM Hm. Brad never did much for me. Doesn't look good in a tux either. Bad tie too. Yep. There is justice in the world after all. Mac - at 11:52 PM indeed there is! American Beauty is amazing -- really impressive Eva - at 11:52 PM I have yet to see it. When is it coming out on video? Mac - at 11:53 PM hard to say -- if it wins Best Picture it'll probably stay in theatres for another month. Eva - at 11:54 PM We're getting closer to the big ones now. Oh, nice real estate joke. Do you think Beauty will take all the big ones? Mac - at 11:55 PM I hope so -- it should at least get best picture and director. Spacey DESERVES best actor, but I'm not sure it'll happen Eva - at 11:56 PM I agree, Spacey should win. Well, we'll find out soon enough. Cider House Rules - that's a good one too. Mac - at 11:56 PM wow, Irving won for cider house. That's cool. I haven't seen it yet, but I heard his adaptation is well done. That in itself deserves an oscar. How many writers do you know that could cut their own novel down to screenplay length Mac - at 11:56 PM did you see cider house? Eva - at 11:57 PM No, not yet, but it's on my list. But I heard a lot of good things about it. Mac - at 11:57 PM heeeeres mel Mac - at 11:58 PM I think beauty will win best original screenplay Eva - at 11:58 PM Oh, the voice. The eyes. The smile. Yeah, I think it will too. Mac - at 11:59 PM tough category Eva - at 11:59 PM Wahooo! Excellent. Mac - at 11:59 PM looking good for Beauty! I wonder if this will work for them or against them with the bigger awards? Eva - at 12:00 AM Doesn't the Academy usually stick to the same movie they give best screenplay to? Mac - at 12:01 AM not sure -- maybe Eva - at 12:01 AM Ok, he's begining to panick. Eva - at 12:01 AM Oh no, Begnini. Wonder what he'll do this time. Mac - at 12:01 AM oh jesus, Begnini's going on Mac - at 12:02 AM maybe he'll trip and impale himself on an oscar Eva - at 12:03 AM I hope he learned a little English in the past year. Haha, that's funny. If anyone would do it, it would be him. Mac - at 12:03 AM it's doubtful helearned anything Eva - at 12:04 AM Yeah. Oh well, at least I hope he keeps it short. He's gotta. They tell him what to say, don't they? Mac - at 12:04 AM yeah, but he'll probably ignore the TelePrompTer Eva - at 12:05 AM Yeah, since he won't know what it says anyways:) Uhoh - here we go. Mac - at 12:05 AM CLEAR! Mac - at 12:06 AM I'M GLAD TO BE A DOG? Mac - at 12:06 AM okay, best actress Mac - at 12:06 AM probably Hilary Swank Eva - at 12:07 AM MY GOD, it's alive. I think he said he wants to be a dog. Most likely. Though I'd like to see Anette crawl on stage:) Mac - at 12:07 AM yeah, annette would probably win an oscar just for that Eva - at 12:08 AM Well, that would be worth it. Julianne is good too, but I don't think she has a chance. Mac - at 12:09 AM nah, she doesn't have a chance Eva - at 12:09 AM How did Meryl Streep get in there? That movie sucked. Mac - at 12:09 AM she gets nominated by default these days. She was nominated for One True Thing last year Mac - at 12:10 AM whoa! from 90210 to Oscar Eva - at 12:10 AM OK, here we go ----- ah, just like we all thought. Yeah, that's what I call a career. Mac - at 12:12 AM she handles herself quite well on stage Eva - at 12:13 AM Well, she's had a lot of practice lately. Awesome dress too - she looks like a winner. Hah - they don't cut her off. Mac - at 12:13 AM did she thank her husband? Eva - at 12:14 AM I don't think so. Hm. That's not nice - he had to live with her while she pretended to be a guy. I bet he never thought he'd be in for that when he married her:) Mac - at 12:15 AM heh, probably not Maybe he was crying because she forgot about him in her moment of glory Eva - at 12:16 AM They didn't show him either, did they? He looks kind of wimpy. She probably always wears the pants in that marriage. Mac - at 12:17 AM he doesn't have a chance, especially now. Anytime he says anything she'll smack him with the Oscar Eva - at 12:18 AM I bet she will. As long as she doesn't make him wear women's clothes though he should count his blessings:) Mac - at 12:18 AM okay, best actor c'mon Kevin! Eva - at 12:18 AM Here comes Fishstick. Eva - at 12:19 AM Yeah, I think it's a lock. Great, she screwed up. Gee, she looks even worse than last year. Mac - at 12:20 AM Kevin...Kevin.... if denzel wins we'll know the WSJ poll was dead on Eva - at 12:21 AM Have you ever seen as many wrinkles as are on that Richard Fransworth guy? Alright, come on, show some good taste. Kevin already. Mac - at 12:21 AM it's gotta be kevin Eva - at 12:22 AM It may be Denzel, just to fulfill the quota. But that wouldn't be fair. Mac - at 12:22 AM no, it wouldn't Mac - at 12:22 AM YESSSSSSS! GO KEVIN! Eva - at 12:22 AM YES!!!! AWESOME! He so deserves it. Eva - at 12:23 AM And he's funny too. Mac - at 12:24 AM yeah, he's hilarious -- his impersonations are the best Eva - at 12:25 AM Good speech. But he's not speechless, come on, he wrote that thing weeks ago. Mac - at 12:25 AM ha! got mom in there again too! She was there when he won for the Usual Suspects Eva - at 12:25 AM Good speech. But he's not speechless, come on, he wrote that thing weeks ago. Mac - at 12:25 AM ha! got mom in there again too! She was there when he won for the Usual Suspects Eva - at 12:26 AM That's sweet. Lucky mom. I'd like to go just once. Ok, this is it. Mac - at 12:26 AM alllrighty, director time probably mendes Mac - at 12:26 AM wow -- they might have it! They might have best picture Eva - at 12:27 AM YES, Mendes. All right. Yeah, I think they'll get it. Mac - at 12:28 AM I hope so Eva - at 12:28 AM Ok, we're going well over in time. Hey, he didn't mention the three younger actors by name - that's not nice. Mac - at 12:28 AM no, he did -- just not a first Mac - at 12:29 AM well here we go Eva - at 12:29 AM Well, he better. Alright, showtime. Mac - at 12:30 AM c'mon beauty! Mac - at 12:30 AM awwwwwww yeah! Eva - at 12:30 AM YES! Now that's sweet. Mac - at 12:30 AM thank god Eva - at 12:31 AM Yeah, now you don't have to go on a rampage:) Eva - at 12:31 AM All of my parents?? Is there something we should know about this guy? Mac - at 12:31 AM that's right! It saves me so much time ;) Mac - at 12:32 AM yeah, I caught that too -- must be a clone Mac - at 12:32 AM and there it is. All done