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Uwe Boll Finally KO's Critics

German horror director/producer Uwe Boll has socked it to the critics - literally.

According to Variety, the director of videogame-based film classics such as "BloodRayne," "Alone in the Dark," and "House of the Dead" (along with a slew of other films that critics love to trash) took on four critics in a series of boxing matches held this weekend in Vancouver.  He kicked the crap out of them.

The event was the result of a challenge Boll sent out last June to some of his harshest critics.  Go a few rounds with him in the ring.  Show him what they REALLY thought of his films.  Somewhat surprisingly, there were takers.

I'm not so sure they knew who they were up against.  While the event was a flagrant publicity stunt (which Boll will admit to), it was carefully chosen.  You see, Boll was an amateur boxer.  To prep for the fights, he apparently refreshed his boxing skills by training with stunt men.  Ouch.

All of the critics conceded defeat within two rounds.  Well, at least they lasted two whole rounds.  That's something.

One challenger, Jeff Sneider of Ain', was taken away by ambulance, vomiting. The word is that his injuries aren't serious.

Chris Alexander of Rue Morgue magazine played to the outlandishness of the event, sporting bat wings and blood capsules in his mouth.  He is hoping to make a documentary feature of the experience.

Other critics that took a beating were Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka of and Nelson Chance Minter, a Maryland-based online critic.

Earlier this month, Boll trounced a fifth critic, Carlos Palencia Jimenez-Arguello (a Spanish online critic known as Oso) during a match in Spain (click here to see the video).

So what was the point?  Boll put it this way:  "Some critics should be better prepared and should be aware of the impact they have with their reviews.  These guys came quite unprepared to the ring, and they felt the consequences of it. If I was the same way with my movies, I would be already out of business."

I don't think there'll be anyone arguing with him - in the ring, anyway.

For those of you itching to view the carnage, check out Wavelit TV, though you have to pay to view the event.  The footage will also be available as an extra on the DVD of Boll's film "Postal" (another videogame adaptation) which is currently in production.  As all video is wont to do, though, it's finding its way to YouTube in various segments.  Click here to see Boll knock the crap out of Lowtax.

Boll's next picture to hit theaters is "In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale," which boasts an all-star cast including Burt Reynolds, Ray Liotta, Leelee Sobieski, Ron Perlman, Claire Forlani, and Jason Statham.

Even if critics have sharp words for Boll's future films, which I'm sure they will, I suspect that they will keep their challenges in print form from now on.  -- Shannon Nolley

Posted by Shannon on September 25, 2006 12:27 PM
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I actually remember hearing about Boll's challenge a few months back. The funniest part of the whole affair was that none of the critics actually did their homework to see if they could actually beat this guy. Now, not are they going to be publicly humiliated on the extra features of "Postal", but they had their asses handed to them in the process.

Hell I'll be the first in line to grab the "Postal" DVD once it hits the shelves just to see the slaughter in DVD quality.

Sure the critics trash talk every movie that his name appears on, but he's taking it straight to the bank.

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