The Lost Blog

Lost: The Night Before Christmas

'Twas the night before Christmas, and through the LOST camp,
The survivors were glum, their spirits were damp
The others had taken Jack, Sawyer, and Kate
And Hurley had managed somehow to gain weight

Eko was killed by a black smokey beast
Who posed as his brother and dressed as a priest
Desmond was starting to glimpse at the future
Benry might die unless Jack does a suture

Things seemed quite hopeless, till Charlie and Locke
Made a startling discovery near the Black Rock
An object had crashed there not too long ago
It was shiny and red and was covered with snow

They gathered some guns and supplies they would need
And recruited Desmond, Jin, Sun, and Sayid,
Back to the crash site the Losties did trek
To dig through the snow and comb through the wreck

No bodies were found, just a big canvas bag
With brightly wrapped boxes, each with a name tag.
It was Santa's red sleigh - to all that was clear.
And a trail in the snow meant that Santa was near

A few hundred yards where the snow starts to taper
Locke bent down and picked up a long piece of paper
After reading the names, crumpled it up in his fist
So angry that he wasn't on Santa's list.

They followed his trail which led to the same cave
Where Eko had once been a Polar Bear's slave
This time the outcome was worse than they feared
All that remained was a head with a beard

Though gruesome a scene, Locke could not help but smile.
To be mauled by a Polar Bear on a tropical isle
Was the last thing a North Pole resident would've expected
Funny how things on this island seem so interconnected

They wondered if Santa Clause with his last breath
Could appreciate the irony in his horrible death.

Happy Holidays, vacc

Bravo vacc! Super Christmas greeting.

>"And Hurley had managed somehow to gain weight" . . . LMAO, really

#1. Posted by: ButchM at December 11, 2006 4:16 PM

Much more interesting than I thought possible... Or really just funny.
Just glad it flowed perfectly.
-good job

#2. Posted by: middies at December 11, 2006 5:52 PM

Bravo!
That was awesome....anyone got a story to the tune of "Dreidel"?
Happy Everthing, Lost fans!

#3. Posted by: Sillygirl0630 at December 11, 2006 7:09 PM

LMAO! that was great!

#4. Posted by: lostfugitive at December 11, 2006 9:45 PM

Dude... That was excellent Thanks for the laugh!

#5. Posted by: Lesley at December 12, 2006 6:40 AM

Happy holidays to all! Looking forward to the new year (FEBURARY!!!!!)

#6. Posted by: meg at December 12, 2006 7:39 AM

dang! Never could spell that month!

#7. Posted by: meg at December 12, 2006 7:40 AM

Great job turning a beloved holiday classic into a gruesome beheading of a cherished childhood memory.

I'm just sad I didn't think of it first... ;-)

#8. Posted by: ransomjackson at December 12, 2006 8:18 AM

A humorous respite to an otherwise grueling day at work! Thanks, vacc. Now back at it, or I just might be decapitated by my boss!

#9. Posted by: GatorGal at December 12, 2006 12:41 PM

WOW vacc - that was really a great job! Thanks for making me smile... Happy Holidays!

#10. Posted by: BunnyLover at December 12, 2006 3:45 PM

HAHAHAHAH LOVE IT!

#11. Posted by: nina at December 14, 2006 10:55 PM

The Quench I needed to get thru X-MAS w/ out Lost!


Thanks!

#12. Posted by: KHH at December 18, 2006 12:42 PM

hi i love lost

#13. Posted by: kot;r6 at December 24, 2006 11:53 PM

That was great, and very Tim Burton-esque!

#14. Posted by: ChristinaLVT at January 3, 2007 8:55 PM