The Lost Blog

Lost Caption: You All Every Butties

This week's LOST Photo Caption takes us back to Season Two's Charlie-centric "Fire + Water". In one of the funniest flashback sequences ever, the Liam and Charlie Pace fronted band Driveshaft tries to expand the band's appeal to a much younger audience - and parlay the remnants of their fading popularity into some much needed cash - by making a TV commercial.

As promised, I will be selecting one caption from among last week's entries If you haven't entered a caption, or voted for your favorite, there's still time.

This week, the LOST Season Four Countdown is back.

Countdown to LOST: The Season 4 Opener

Post your caption(s), cheesy puns, or other LOST ramblings through the comments area at the bottom of the page. Namaste!

butties ad

New Caption Contest +13 Mins +43 Secs...
Description posted = YES. Photo posted = NO. Just a big white blank where the photo should be. So I am going with:
Liam - "Charlie."
Charlie - "What Liam?"
Liam - "Want to see my impression of a polar bear in a snow storm?"

#1. Posted by: ANON2 at October 27, 2007 1:13 PM

"me charlie me stupid""

charlie did big poopoo!!!

#2. Posted by: Luuk van der Linde at October 27, 2007 1:36 PM

@ANON2 - Nice catch on me forgetting to include the picture.

#3. Posted by: vacc at October 27, 2007 3:27 PM

Charlie: Wow! These diapers really are leak proof.

Liam: Tell me about it! Twelve takes without a bathroom break.

Director : CUT!

Liam: oops! Make that thirteen takes. Hey baby brother, I have an idea..

Charlie: Number Two? Don't even think about it!

Liam: No, not that! My idea is that we should turn this commercial into our next music video. And we should change the name of the band.

Charlie: (Removes his pacifier) Change the name? To what?


#4. Posted by: vacc at October 27, 2007 8:56 PM

Larry the Cable Guy (left rear) - "I made brown"!

vacc (right front) - "I made a boo-boo".

RNM (right rear) - "Have you ever considered existentialism as a premeditated spiritual course in the daily conduct of your life"?

Charlie (left front) (under his breath) - "for cryin' out loud... i was a hobbitt... dammit! peter jackson would never do this to me... damn you lindelof!"

#5. Posted by: ANON2 at October 27, 2007 9:03 PM

sorry vacc - didn't mean to be snippy. I guess I picked up the 7 - 10 split on the polar bears in the picture - not knowing they were there. the polar bear in a snow storm joke ends with... but you won't see him soon - he's constipated - standing in front of an Ex-Lax vending machine - but his dollar bill is crumpled and the vending machine won't accept it.

#6. Posted by: ANON2 at October 27, 2007 9:18 PM

Wait is this a diaper comercial, or is nair launching a new mens line?

#7. Posted by: Kaseygirl at October 28, 2007 2:37 PM

Wait is this a diaper comercial, or is nair launching a new mens line?

#8. Posted by: Kaseygirl at October 28, 2007 2:37 PM

"Honey, I shrunk the band."

#9. Posted by: Trinity at October 28, 2007 4:21 PM

Liam: "Charlie - wardrobe said tightie whities!"

Charlie: "My bad. I thought they said mighty whities. What did the rest of you guys hear?"

Driveshaft: "DEPENDS!"

Charlie: "On what?"

(Everyone on set snickers & giggles uncontrollably for twenty seconds).

#10. Posted by: MorBidO at October 28, 2007 8:31 PM

"Anyone Notice The Diapers?"

#11. Posted by: BunnyLover at October 28, 2007 10:55 PM

Liam: Let's just hurry and get this over with.

Charlie: At least we won't need to stop for a bathroom break.

#12. Posted by: bcre8ve at October 29, 2007 9:27 AM

Liam: This is not what I had in mind when you invited us all over after the concert to hang out at your crib.

#13. Posted by: bcre8ve at October 29, 2007 9:29 AM

Charlie: What's with that thing over our heads... with the numbers counting backwards.

Sinjin: Beats the blooody 'ell outta me. I thought it was some hi-tech mobile - lets babies know when to go to sleep..

Charlie: What do you think it is Liam?

Liam: Wait just a minute little brother. I'm still reading.. (laughs) ..that vacc always cracks me up.

Patrick: Look! One of the bears is getting another fish biscuit.

Charlie: Someone pay attention this time. It can't be THAT hard.

#14. Posted by: vacc at October 29, 2007 9:54 AM

Charlie: Is that a bannana in your diaper?

#15. Posted by: bcre8ve at October 29, 2007 10:21 AM

"Psst, the abacus on the crib reads 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42!"

#16. Posted by: Cecil Rose at October 29, 2007 10:41 AM

Liam: I'm trying to absorb how low we've sunk...I can't believe we're doing this.

Charlie: Hold on...I'm in the middle of absorbing something else!

#17. Posted by: JoePike at October 29, 2007 10:48 AM

Liam: "What was that Charlie?"


Liam: "'re really into character."

#18. Posted by: Red...Neck...Man at October 29, 2007 12:20 PM


Charlie eye's frantically searched the room as water filled the underwater hatch where he was to meet his doom. Looking under the console seat he spied a trap door. He hurriedly opened the door, jumped through it, and found himself in the Dharma Crib Hatch.

Yes, it seems that what we thought was a flashback in season 2 was in reality a flashforward to season 4. In a command performance and by the magical powers of the island, Driveshaft is reunited and forced to sing at Mr Friendly's memorial service.


#19. Posted by: bcre8ve at October 29, 2007 3:22 PM

The cast and crew, upon hearing of Charlie's demise and Mr Monaghan's subsequent unemployment, staged a benefit concert where he was able to showcase his latest endorsement deal - Dom's Dharma Diapers.

#20. Posted by: bcre8ve at October 29, 2007 3:28 PM

In a backstage interview after shooting this scene, both bears in the shot admitted to singing, "We claw everybody."

"'You ALL everybody?' Come on, that just doesn't make any sense" said one of the bears speaking on condition of anonymity. "How embarrassing. If I would have known the real lyrics going into the shoot, I would have never agreed to the project."

"I hope the boys back at the hatch don't see this. I'll never live it down."

When asked if it was difficult working long hours with humans who happen to fall lower on the food chain than the bears, the reply was, "No, we're professionals. Besides they were all pretty scrawny."

"Hey, yeah, there you go. Now THERE are some lyrics that make more sense, 'We are pretty scrawny.'"

The bears sat back, shared a laugh, and opened a nice cool bottle of Coca Cola. "Ah, life is good."

#21. Posted by: bcre8ve at October 29, 2007 3:57 PM


Is that the crib from the Driveshaft video?...OR...Is that the jail they place all the LOST cast DUI'ers??

#22. Posted by: Red...Neck...Man at October 29, 2007 4:37 PM

Awww, I miss the Lost question of the week! How many months to go? (sigh)


Liam: Wow, RNM is right, this is like baby jail, man! Like where all the babies would go if they robbed the Playschool Bank, ya know? Hey, little bro, sing it with me! "Warden threw a party at the County jail! Prison band was there and they began to wail!"

Charlie: Lay off the smack, Liam.

#23. Posted by: Clementine at October 29, 2007 8:38 PM


Just wanted to comment breifly. I was going to keep that going throughout our break but decided against. The main reasons are that 1) It is usually topical, being tied to an episode or thread here, 2) requires thought by me, and 3) traditionally has a more serious tone vs. the more jovial/comical LOST Captions (continued thanks vacc!!).

I'll pro'ly be gearing back up a few weeks before we start again. If anyone was wondering....yes, I do still sleep with my 'He Who Is Always Last' award every night! And I'm enjoying dominating the MLBFFL (fantasy football for ya'll who don't know)...but who's surprised by that?!?!

Later ya'll.

#24. Posted by: Red...Neck...Man at October 30, 2007 11:59 AM

"Woo Hoo, we're down to double digits until we can get outa this lousy joint!"

#25. Posted by: Cecil Rose at October 30, 2007 3:15 PM

UPDATE - A winner has been chosen for the previous photo caption! As promised, the photo has been updated, permanently immortalizing our winner.

To see the award winning caption or to send your congrats to the winner - or to just add some more fun things for us all to read - just click the link below the comments for "Lost Caption: On the Road to Shambala "

Depending on any feedback I get about the popup photo caption I may try to do something similar with future captions.

#26. Posted by: vacc at October 30, 2007 11:49 PM

I like the idea of selecting a winning caption, though I'm not particularly in love with the pop-up caption approach. Just entered under the photo would be fine with me.

#27. Posted by: Cecil Rose at October 31, 2007 12:38 PM

Wow! This dream is weirder than the one about being on that Lost island!!

#28. Posted by: meg at November 1, 2007 10:50 AM

Caption: (Voice Over) This week on "Behind the Music - Teletubbies: The Heroin Years"... we get a rare glimpse of our beloved tubbies, minus costumes, in rehearsal for their 2003 PBS special - Wee All Everybody.

#29. Posted by: DocH at November 1, 2007 7:53 PM

@DocH #29 - LMAO - that was too funny!

Thanks to you I now have this picture in my head...

Baby Aaron's face is superimposed on the sun... which begins rising slowly over the crib.. he laughs.. as bunnies begin hopping all around.. then.. one by --------------------------------------
one... the teletubbies wake from their naps...

"Drinky Winky!"...
"Tipsy!" ...
"Stoner!" ...
"Ho!" ...

As one of the bunnies hops playfully by, Drinky Winky picks it up, pets it's soft white fur, then with the skill of a Japanese Sushi master, he kills and skins his breakfast..

Ho: "Eh-Oh!"
Stoner's diaper begins to emit an eerie yellow glow.. As we are drawn closer to the rear of Stoner's diaper, it turns into a video screen, and a film begins to play

Film: "Hello. I'm Dr. Marvin Candle. On behalf of Alvar Hanso and the deGroots, welcome to the Dharma Initiative. This station is called PBS and has been brought to you by the letter H, and by a grant from the Hanso Foundation."

The teletubbies are distracted.. A shadow cast from high above the crib gets larger as the gigantic image of Elmo slowly descends. It is a hot air balloon, and the teletubbies gather around it excitedly as it lands. There is one item inside - a shiny silver box with a strange dial.

"Tubby Toast!" they all squeal, as the shiny box begins to spew dozens of brown disc shaped objects into the air - each bearing the Dharma Initiative logo.

"Eh-oh!" says HO. "Where's Stoner?"
The teletubbies scamper about, looking for Stoner. They all converge from different directions and collide beneath a tree, where they find Stoner..

"Stoner's Bong!" they exclaim, as Stoner inhales from the rainbow colored cylinder. Stoner exhales a stream of black smoke, which began to slowly circle the teletubbies, before stopping in front of Tipsy.

"Eh Oh!" they all say, as the black smoke wraps itself around Tipsy's feet and drags the poor, screaming Tipsy into the nearby woods.

Drinky Winky removes his binky, opens a Heineken, and places a nipple over the opening. He hands it to Ho who drinks eagerly from the bottle.

Drinky Winky and Stoner take turns sharing the rainbow cylinder while waiting for Ho to get good and buzzed.

It's going to be a wonderful day. Teletubbies love each other very much!!

#30. Posted by: vacc at November 2, 2007 10:27 AM

→ 30. vacc
WOW... I squeezed off a little chucklebuster. You put your LMAO machine gun on full auto. Nicely done. I just feel for the folks out there that are goin', "What's a teletubbie?"
Tough to get the tubbies out of mind. Fortunately kindergarten started a few months ago and the t-tubs are silent, for now. Although, if I was forced to watch TV and the only shows on were Teletubbies and Tyra? Sorry Tyra... they are much more intelligent.
The one thing I would add to the →30 diatribe is where they order a dozen pizzas, but then argue whether or not they should have said "cheese-meister", in order to get a discount.

#31. Posted by: DocH at November 2, 2007 11:14 AM

Hey, DocH, the Teletubbies put in a surprise appearance at last night's Georgia Tech-Virginia Tech football game on ESPN. One announcer could even name tham all (although he got La La wrong and said "Lu Lu" before being passed a note from the production staff).

This game is known as the annual confusion bowl, as the announcers breathlessly announce that "'Tech' has scored. On... Tech. Uh."

Anyway, it ws the good Tech winning last night. (Virginia, Yay)

Now on to tomorrow night...

GEAUX TIDE, roll over the tiggers.

#32. Posted by: Cecil Rose at November 2, 2007 11:49 AM

Congrats to DocH.

I can't imagine anybody else having a chance at winning this weeks caption contest after that hilarious TT Voice-over post!

Methinks we are going to have a gaggle of contenders for next season's endtime caption contest. (Red..Neck..Man - I suggest you begin to sharpen your wits - that "repeat boast" you made may be slightly more difficult than imagined . . . )

#33. Posted by: davidrh at November 2, 2007 1:41 PM

I don't know... I still have to bow to the visual imagery of post →30. If vacc ever needs to crash on my couch, e'd be welcome. All I ask is that I get a heads-up... enough time to hide all my cutlery.

#34. Posted by: DocH at November 2, 2007 3:12 PM

Liam: What kind of a PSA did you say this is Charlie?

Charlie: It has something to do with tobacco.

Liam: Charles! Let me see that script. (grabs it roughly, flips through it quickly, eyes open widely, clears throat)... ummm, guys... it is public service - but its' not tobacco - it is a snuff film - killing Driveshaft is considered a public service....

If we are voting already, I am going with
#9 Trinity."Honey, I shrunk the band."
That had me rolling.
Second choice is
#21 bcre8ve. w/anonymous polars & "We claw everybody"

#35. Posted by: MorBid0 at November 2, 2007 6:31 PM

@RMN/#24: "I'm enjoying dominating the MLBFFL"
Ahem! Just who exactly is all alone in first place right now? Yeah, that's right, beyotch! :) And I won the caption contest, too! I'm unstoppable!

#36. Posted by: Trinity at November 4, 2007 8:19 PM

@ Trinity/#36: My Avatar and weekly Smack-Talk are also unstoppable. There's nothing like talking trash in a full-blown LOST/Fantasy Football fun! My favorite so far:

"On game days, I like to take a certain type of nap...a DIRT NAP!"
-my team name is Nikki's Revenge for those who don't know, or care...

#37. Posted by: Red...Neck...Man at November 5, 2007 11:49 AM

RNM/#37: Funny, I would've said the same thing about my avatar and smack talk. Hines Ward is gonna come through for me tonight, too, so I will remain all alone in first place. Tomorrow's FF headline: "Juicy Island Nipples Trumps Nikki's Decomposing, Sand-Covered Nipples."
HAHA! God, I kill me!

#38. Posted by: Trinity at November 5, 2007 8:23 PM

@ Trinity: I still haven't looked at the results from last night....but I must say, there is never a good reason for nipple coverage...sand or otherwise...EVER!!!!

#39. Posted by: Red...Neck...Man at November 6, 2007 12:45 PM

YES....VICTORY....8-1 RECORD...BEST IN THE LEAGUE!!!! -but I digress

#40. Posted by: Red...Neck...Man at November 6, 2007 12:50 PM

What is this?!? Fantasy Porno Football League?!?

I'm not sure, but I think I'm getting vicariously thrilled . . .

#41. Posted by: davidrh at November 6, 2007 3:01 PM

I blame your narrow victory solely on the weather. Everyone knows Big Ben can't pass in the rain. Plus, didn't you see the way he ran away screaming like a girl when that bolt of lightning hit the stadium right before the game? Just a TD pass or 2 to Hines and that win would've been mine. I'm coming back next week (though without Brady I'm not sure how yet). And I WILL be the league champion! I'll even get my own FF in S6! Just you wait, Mr. Higgins.!

Da Trin

P.S. I know what you mean about nipple coverage. Nikki coverd her nipples about as well as Baltimore covered the red zone.

#42. Posted by: Trinity at November 6, 2007 7:54 PM


Several months back this post appeared:

@ davidrh

A KU fan huh? I'm in K.C., have been a Jayhawks fan my whole life. Nice to see that there are some people out there not afraid to support the Hawks even when they aren't the best team in college football.
Å® 20. Posted by: ANTP? at September 10, 2007 10:25 AM

But now, WE ARE!!!!! (Well, close at least . . . )

So all you folks with your heads in the NFL take a look at me bursting with Jayhawk Pride! (Admittedly, because of our dismal football record this past 75 years, I have given some thought as to whether there has been a alien adduction and substitution on the plains of Kansas this fall . . . ) Cue: Twilight Zone theme.

You gotta believe.

#43. Posted by: davidrh at November 8, 2007 10:47 AM

DavidRH, may I introduce you to the "Lost: Random Topic Area" over in Lost News, added for just this purpose, where *nothing* is off-topic, and everythibng goes (well, within the usual TVFodder civility rules, anyway.)

Plenty of football discussion over there...

Oh, and Rooooooooooooll Tide

Go Trojans

Fight Falcons

and Yay, Vols
(except on the third Saturday in October. of course)

#44. Posted by: Cecil Rose at November 8, 2007 1:59 PM

Cecil. I had no idea that particular site was still going. I'll check it out. Thanks for the heads up!


#45. Posted by: davidrh at November 10, 2007 3:57 PM