The Lost Blog

Lost Caption: Where's my watch? Axe Michael!

Happy New Year everyone!! 2008 is finally here, which means less than a month till Season Four!! If you haven't already checked it out, here's a link to the season four trailer. I'll keep including the season four countdown timer in any captions I add leading up to Jan 31.

Countdown to LOST Season Four :


Countdown to LOST: The Season 4 Opener



For the first caption of the new year, we go back to Season One's Jin and Sun centric episode "House of the Rising Sun"

In this scene, our Korean hero's inability to verbally express himself has landed him in a predicament.. Instead of politely saying to Michael "That's my watch", he says "ì €ê²ƒì€ 나의 시계 이다" - which Michael misinterprets as "Can I watch?". In classic "Three's Company" fashion, misunderstandings quickly lead to assault, bondage, and an angry black man wielding an ax over the head of a frightened Asian prisoner.

But everything works out fine in the end. Michael uses the ax to free Jin, and then gives him his watch back. And everyone on the island gets to share a laugh when they learn that Sun spoke fluent English the entire time they've been on the island.

Post your captions or any other LOST ramblings below this week's photo. Namaste!


Michael frees Jin

Michael:
Don't they have deodorant in Korea? I can't beat away your BO smell much longer!

#1. Posted by: JoePike at January 2, 2008 12:49 PM

Michael: "Jin - Look at this back scratcher I found when I was in the shower!!"

Jin: "저것은 나의 시계 !!" (Translation: "Your barn door is open, and your stretching has brought out Mr. Happy!!)

#2. Posted by: ANTP? at January 2, 2008 1:22 PM

Michael: "Don't worry Jin... Would you rather have Kate cut your cuffs???"

#3. Posted by: middies at January 2, 2008 2:11 PM

Michael - Dude... that's the biggest charm I have ever seen on any charm bracelet... mans' or womans'. Here, let me help you get that off before you go swimming.

Jin - Hai, com sam nee da. How you say? umm... bling-bling, umm... the real thing - hai!

#4. Posted by: MorBid0 at January 2, 2008 2:37 PM

Michael:
“I’m a lumberjack and I’m OK;
I sleep all night and I work all day!”
Now you with the chorus! Sing, dammit!!!

Jin:
“He a lumma-jack and he OK; he seep arr night an he work arr day!”
Arr day! Arr day, OK??!!

Michael (laughing maniacally):
All right, now let’s do Proud Mary...
you know, cause a the big wheels...

#5. Posted by: Clementine at January 2, 2008 2:44 PM

Michael:
No more fish! I want red meat, and I don’t care where it comes from!

Jin (in Korean and, fortunately, never understood):
Wait! You have no idea how good dog meat can taste...

#6. Posted by: Clementine at January 2, 2008 2:48 PM

Michael: "I told you....NEVER touch a black man's radio!!"

Jin: (in Korean) "Do yooouuuu, understaaaand, the woooords, that are coming outta my mouth?!?!"

Michael: "I don't speak blackanese dammit!!"

#7. Posted by: Red...Neck...Man at January 2, 2008 3:19 PM

Rehearsal sound bites:

Harold: "Dammit Daniel! ... I'm seriously peeved! I just met with Damon and Carlton - we had a telecon with J.J. - and guess what? I am outta here at the end of next season... and not outta here in a hero kinda way! I'm outta here in an evil, pariah, stupid f%&*ing kinda way. If this weren't a damn nerf axe - I just might take your arm off - for real."

Daniel-Dae: "I hear you Harry. I had a similar con-fab a week ago with the producers and guess what? They had no love for me either. They said if I didn't get with their program, my character wouldn't man-wrestle with Yoon-Jin, not get to learn English at an accelerated rate - AND - they would trump-up some 'DUI' charges against me with Honolulu Five-Oh."

Harold: "Wow... I didn't realize they were against so many of us. Sidebar Danny? When I say the word 'Cloverfield' - does that mean anything to you?"

Daniel-Dae: "ummm... hmmn.. uh... nope!"

#8. Posted by: DocH at January 3, 2008 12:33 AM

Michael: "I'm sorry I took your watch, Man. To make up for it, I'll stand here with this axe and be your own personal sun dial!"

#9. Posted by: Trinity at January 3, 2008 1:45 AM

I told you one more time with the fried chicken and watermelon reference and I'm going Bronx-style on your a$$. Now go find me some moo-goo gai pan or a California roll and I dont want to see you on this beach until you do. Fried chicken........ I ought to..........

#10. Posted by: katespanties at January 3, 2008 9:49 AM

Michael: "Iiiiiii've been workin' on tha Koreeeeeeeeaaaan......Aaaaaaallll tha live long daaaaaaaaaaaay."

#11. Posted by: Red...Neck...Man at January 3, 2008 10:43 AM

So, Vacc, you're a traditionalist, pointing the countdown to the actula first episode at 9PM, and not to the "Lost Special" preceding it at 8PM?

#12. Posted by: Cecil Rose at January 3, 2008 1:22 PM

"This is the last time I'm telling you this. NO! MORE! KIMCHI!"

#13. Posted by: Cecil Rose at January 3, 2008 1:23 PM

-Caption-

Jin: No Michael, not the fire "AX".

Michael: Then what?

Jin: Over there, in my shaving kit... "AXE"... The exciting new body spray for men. You know the commercial where a thousand bikini clad, pheromone-crazed gals come charging out of the sea, down the beach and from the deep jungle - I just thought they could rescue help us.

Michael: Understood Jin. It doesn't work. I've already tried it and all I got was a thousand pheromone-crazed Medusa Spiders chasing my butt around for three days. Besides, I lent the can of "AXE" to Paolo... he didn't smell so good.

#14. Posted by: ANON2 at January 3, 2008 3:11 PM

Before they made it big on the ABC hit series "LOST", Harold Perrineau Jr. and Daniel Dae Kim audition for James Cameron's 1997 blockbuster Titanic.

TITANIC - Screen Test
Harold Perrineau Jr. . . . Rose DeWitt Bukater
Daniel Dae Kim . . . . . . Jack Dawson

Setting:
MASTER AT ARMS OFFICE

Daniel-Dae has climbed up on the bench, and is hugging the waterpipe. Harold wades in, holding the axe above his head.


Harold: "Will this work?"
Daniel-Dae: "We'll find out."

They are both terrified, but trying to keep panic at bay.
Daniel-Dae positions the chain connecting the two cuffs, stretching it taut across the steel pipe. The chain is of course very short, and his exposed wrists are on either side of it.

Daniel-Dae:"Try a couple practice swings."
Harold hefts the axe and thunks it into a wooden cabinet.


Daniel-Dae:"Now try to hit the same mark again."

Harold swings hard and the blade thunks in exactly the same spot as before.

James Cameron: "CUT!" He looks at Harold disapprovingly. "Rose wasn't supposed to hit the same spot on that second swing, Harold. She misses by about four inches. This way we can build up the suspense when Rose swings the axe at the handcuffs."

Harold : "I wasn't trying to hit the same spot. I aimed far away from it, but I never swung an axe before.. "

Daniel-Dae: Looks nervously at Harold and the Axe.

James Cameron: "Ok, let's continue from there... Places everyone.. and... ACTION!"


Daniel-Dae: "Okay, Rose. That's enough practice." He winces, bracing himself as Harold raises the axe.

Harold: "I'm scared Jack."

Daniel-Dae: "You can do it, Rose. Hit it as hard as you can, I trust you."

The axe comes down. K-WHANG!
Daniel-Dae: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" His scream of agony could be heard throughout the studio.
As Daniel-Dae raises his severed arm, blood spurts freely. His hand and about an inch of his arm remain attached to the handcuff. As he lifts his unsevered arm, the detached hand slips away from the cuff and falls.
Harold: "I'm so sorry!" he approaches Daniel to offer whatever help or comfort he can, but stops when he notices a shiny metallic object beneath waist deep water. He bends to pick it up - it is a watch, and from the looks of it, a quite expensive one.

Daniel-Dae : "Hey! That's my watch!!"

#15. Posted by: vacc at January 3, 2008 5:37 PM

AGAIN vacc! You rule in the visual imagery department... Titanic as well as earlier TeleTubbies references.

Your saga above gave me flashbacks to "Monty Python and The Holy Grail" where the Black Knight stubbornly stood his ground and subsequently had his arms loped-off, followed by a leg, and then the other.

Michael: "You are indeed brave, Sir Knight, but the fight is mine." then...

Michael: "Look, you stupid bastard, you've got no arms left!" and finally...

Michael: "What are you gonna do, bleed on me?!", and then Jin.

Jin: (ignoring his fatal flaw - no limbs) "Tis only a flesh wound!"

#16. Posted by: DocH at January 3, 2008 7:23 PM

Tina! Bring me the axe!

#17. Posted by: FenwayBen at January 5, 2008 10:10 PM

micheal: heres johny!!!

#18. Posted by: luuk at January 8, 2008 11:19 AM

Jin: Michael, I am not red-headed and I am not your stepchild!?!

#19. Posted by: green at January 9, 2008 6:35 PM

Michael: .... and one for good luck!

#20. Posted by: green at January 9, 2008 6:38 PM

Michael: "Jin....hold still...you've got something in your teeth."

#21. Posted by: Red...Neck...Man at January 11, 2008 11:28 AM

Oh, I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay...

#22. Posted by: FenwayBen at January 12, 2008 9:37 AM

I's a killer man, I's a killer!
You don't knows dat! Huh?
Keep watchin' man, cause you gonna
sees dat I's a killer! Jest take anodder breff udda dat smart mouf of yours, 'en I's might jest kills ya right dis minute!

#23. Posted by: ButchM at January 15, 2008 5:45 PM

Michael: Stop calling me Jack!

Jin: Sorry, all of you non-Asians look alike!

#24. Posted by: bcre8ve at January 17, 2008 4:40 PM

This is soooo OT, but it's a bizarre article and made me laugh because the doctor's name is Cecile Rose.

http://tinyurl*com/yvq83e

(replace * with .)

#25. Posted by: FenwayBen at January 17, 2008 10:00 PM