The Lost Blog

LOST Caption: Under the Knife

In Season Three's Juliet centric episode "Not In Portland" ,  Jack plays a real life version of "Operation".   After already cutting Ben's kidney sac to buy escape time for Kate and Sawyer, Jack slices into an artery.. OOPS! Can our hero stop the bleeding, and remove the tumor from Ben's spine.. without touching the sides? What else does he find in there? Time for a new LOST Photo Caption.

Scheduling Update: Time to get ready for LOST Season 5.  Here's a rundown on ABC's LOST schedule leading into the premiere - all times shown are Eastern Standard.

Wednesday Jan 14 at 8pm: Another chance to see the entire 3 hour Season 4 finale "There's No Place Like Home".  

Wednesday Jan 21 at 8pm: Catch up on previous LOST happenings with the 1 hour recap episode "LOST: Destiny Calls"    

Wednesday Jan 21 at 9pm: Season 5 premieres with two new episodes: "Because You Left" and "The Lie"

Countdown to LOST: Season 5

Post your captions, comments, or any other LOST ramblings below this week's photo. 

On behalf of the DeGroots, Alvar Hanso, and all of us here at the Lost Blog - thank you, Namasté, and good luck

Jack operates

FIRST! Well... kinda. I haven't really thought of anything yet. =]

#1. Posted by: ilovebenjaminlinusxx at January 14, 2009 8:56 AM

Tom: Is it lupus?

Jack: It's not lupus. It's NEVER lupus.

#2. Posted by: Daniel Denial at January 14, 2009 9:08 AM

Except when it IS lupus.

#3. Posted by: Cecil at January 14, 2009 10:50 AM

"Actually, this operation only takes five minute, I just like looking at Ben's a**."

#4. Posted by: Cecil at January 14, 2009 10:51 AM

"What do you think, doc, have I got a shot?"

"He's taken, Tom, sorry."

#5. Posted by: Cecil at January 14, 2009 10:56 AM

"Let's see. Foot bone connects to the ankle bone, ankle bone connects to the shin bone, shin bone connects to the..."

#6. Posted by: Cecil at January 14, 2009 10:59 AM

"Hmmm forceps, forceps... I used to know what a forceps was. Wait, wait, it'll come back to me."

#7. Posted by: Cecil at January 14, 2009 11:02 AM

Jack: Hey Tom, can this thing get ABC? It's Wednesday night and I hear there's this great show on.

Tom (pulling the cable lead from the socket): No. No it can't.

#8. Posted by: Daniel Denial at January 14, 2009 11:32 AM

Tom: Please be careful taking that out. That doll is really important to Ben. His childhood sweetheart gave it to him on his birthday.

Jack: And you're trying to tell me he just sat on it? Accidentally?

#9. Posted by: vacc at January 14, 2009 11:32 AM

Jack: Ben doesn't need a spinal surgeon. What he needs is a proctologist.

Tom: Actually, I am a proctologist.

Jack: Then why won't Ben let YOU remove the tumor from his colon.

Ben: (wakes during surgery) Because, Jack, during the last colon exam, he had BOTH of his hands on my shoulders.

#10. Posted by: vacc at January 14, 2009 11:39 AM

Jack: So that's where Smokey comes from! Who'd have guessed.

#11. Posted by: Daniel Denial at January 14, 2009 12:20 PM

Jack: No, Tom. I said I need a Bud Light...

#12. Posted by: ransomjackson at January 14, 2009 1:16 PM

Jack: Hmmm...let's see...gerbil, heroin baggies, flashlight, cell phone set to vibrate, candle...nope...can't find it.

Tom: You sure?

Jack: Look, if Locke's head was truly in there I woulda seen it by now.

#13. Posted by: ransomjackson at January 14, 2009 1:20 PM

Tom: Careful, Doc, don't touch the sides or his nose'll light up and he'll buzz.

#14. Posted by: ransomjackson at January 14, 2009 1:21 PM

Jack: Look at this Tom... a collapsible satellite dish with alien writing all over it. That thing looks like it can extend 70 feet into the sky.

Tom: Why do you think we nicknamed him Cartman.

Jack: (giggling) I must have missed that episode - "Not in South Park".

Ben: For the love all things you hold dear to yourself Jack... DO NOT pull my finger right now.

Tom: (hand signals to Jack - can I pull it?)

Jack: (grinning like a banshee - nods yes.)

#15. Posted by: DocH at January 14, 2009 5:12 PM

Jack: Now look closely, Tom. The wax is just starting to melt. If you let it get too hot, you could give him a nasty burn. Pass me that wooden spatula.

Tom: Say, Doc, where'd you learn to do this?

Jack: Beauty school drop-out.

Ben: I decided I wanted a Brazilian, and a cosmetologist fell from the sky!

#16. Posted by: Clementine at January 14, 2009 8:58 PM

Jack: I swear! The Red Sox won the series! I saw it right here!

Tom: Drinking again, Jack?

#17. Posted by: Clementine at January 14, 2009 9:03 PM

Re #13: Okay, ransom, you made me laugh out loud...& now Miss Longthought wants to know what I was laughing about! (No, I'm not going to tell her...) ; )

#18. Posted by: Alaïs_Longthought at January 14, 2009 9:12 PM

Jack- "There they are again - I keep hearing this darn whispering."

Ben- "That would be my extremely lower bowel Jack. I had a falling out with Jacob, and this is his punishment."

Tom- "That IS the source of all the whispers on the island, Doc. We got use to it years ago."

Jack- "Hand me that speculum, I can't hear them very well."

[after some prying]

Whispers- ".ereh fo tuo evird ll'ew dna syek rac ym dnif em pleH"

- - - -
[in reverse - "Help me find my car keys and we'll drive out of here."]

#19. Posted by: ANON2 at January 15, 2009 2:47 AM

Jack: So Ben was talking to himself?

Tom: Yep.

Jack: And he muttered about wishing he could get to the Black Rock.

Tom: Yep.

Jack: And you thought you'd help.

Tom: Yep.

Jack: So you went to New York, asked some guy called Arturo to find you a colored guy?

Tom: Yep.

Jack: And you brought that guy back to the Island, took him to Ben's tent?

Tom: Yep.

Jack: While Ben was exercising?

Tom: Yep.

Jack: And you thought Ben had seen you coming, because he was bent over, touching his toes?

Tom: Yep.

Jack: And you colored friend did ... ... this?

Tom: Yep.

Jack: Tom. Didn't it /ever/ occur to you that you'd misheard? Ben said Black /Rock/ - he wished he could get to the Black /Rock/. Not ... what you though.

Tom: It occurred to me *grins* but this was a lot more fun :-)

Jack: (*speechless*)

Tom: You think that's bad? Wait till he sees I've changed his surname on all his notebooks to Dover.

#20. Posted by: Daniel Denial at January 15, 2009 8:53 AM

Jack: Geez Ben, you got a large anal cavity. Geez, Ben, you got a large anal cavity.

Tom: Hey Doc, why'd'ja say that twice?

Jack: I didn't.

#21. Posted by: ransomjackson at January 15, 2009 10:52 AM

Jack: Hey might wanna try doin' a few more squats. I haven't seen a caboose this old since I worked for Union Pacific.

#22. Posted by: ransomjackson at January 15, 2009 10:55 AM

"There's the problem, his heart is two sizes too small."

#23. Posted by: Cecil at January 15, 2009 11:39 AM

Tom [smugly]: You didn’t believe me, but I *told* you I could do it!

Jack: I can still hardly believe my eyes, but the sonogram doesn’t lie. The rectal pressure you applied has nudged the tumor from the base of Ben’s spine into the perfect position for it to be excised! HOW did you do that?

Tom: What can I say … I am an artist, Jack.

Jack: And you certainly have signed your work! Still amazed, by the reach though …

Tom: Well, Arturo nicknamed me “Tom Thumb” for the same reason a sumo wrestler might go by “Tiny.” [winks]

Ben [still gritting his teeth]: Tom, I hate you!

Tom: That’s not what your elevated hips are screaming, sunshine!

Jack [giggling]: Oops! Now look what you made me do!

#24. Posted by: ealgumby at January 15, 2009 10:06 PM

My vote goes to Cecil/23. I'm picturing Rabbit #8 with an antler tied to his head! :)

#25. Posted by: Clementine at January 15, 2009 10:50 PM

Mr. Friendly: Jeez Jack, remind me never to pass out at one of your parties. Ben's gonna kill us when he sobers up!

#26. Posted by: FenwayBen at January 20, 2009 1:57 AM